Akismet is doing a great job when it comes to filter out most of the blog comment spam. But sometimes there are spammers who aren´t known yet by the Akismet database. As I moderate most of the comments on my blog, I sometimes find one or another spam attempt and flag them manually. But often the spam comments are so stupid, that this is one of the more funny tasks as a blogger. Blog spam contributes at least to the amusement.
This is why I thought I´ll publish a little series of articles about spam comments every now and then. I will call the series “Hilarious Spam Comment Examples” and this here will be the first article of the set. Indeed, I will only use screenshots and I will censor stuff like the email or web adress to spare you the shitty links of the spammers. So let´s take a look at the first spam comment…
How do I say it? I must have helped this guy so much out with my article “My Top 5 Online Places with the Shittiest Community” that he wanted to thank and gift me with a free link to his irrelevant weightloss plan for men. What he maybe didn´t expect, is that I will thank him too as he inspired me to create a new comedy spam comment article series on my blog.
What he maybe also didn´t expect is, that I will outrank at least his weight loss website on google with just the article I write here at the moment, as my blog is pretty much stronger than his by Google punished website. But if he would have asked me with my experience in search engine optimization, he would have gotten advice that his keyword choice is a total fail anyway. Maybe he just thought he could outrank big magazines like MensHealth and a dozen of other established websites who wrote already a million of times about weightloss with his exact keyword phrase.
What ever he aimed for, he failed and he will fail in the future. Oh, and not to mention that my doctor suggested me to gain weight, when I visited him a few days ago. But he agreed when I told him that I lost a little bit more pounds on a healthy way as I delute my pretty much sugar-containing icetea now with 50% of water.
Be prepared for the next hilarious spam comment. I think they could be a nice source of inspiration to tell you some more things about me. Until then I just can add that I am currently not sure if it´s just my humor or if I really can make some more people laugh. 😀 Let´s see.
4 thoughts on “Hilarious Spam Comment Examples Part 1”
I feel a little sad that I don’t get weightloss for men tips now, it’s one thing that I get junk mail to do with viagra etc when I’m female, but I would appreciate not being discriminated against on wordpress! Haha.. My comments I receive are all in broken English about my fantastic articles, or with describing words which I don’t think the words mean what they think they mean.. Just deleted 6 spam on one of my posts, I must say Akismet is brilliant!
Agree. The spam comments are often completely out of place and not related to the article these guys trying to spam. They usually use SEO spam tools with proxy servers and send them out in mass. It is completely automated. This is why it is easy to spot spam comments if Akismet didn´t catch the comments. The spam guys hope for a lucky hit that a percentage of the comments will come through… but what they don´t know… even then this technique does rather hurt their websites as google will punish them hard lol. People who spam on this way are absolute beginners.
I also agree about the english. I am german and I would not say that all my articles on my blog are written in perfect english as it is not my native language, however… even I often have to laugh about the english in the spam comments. They are usually written in horrible english lol. You are right. 🙂